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Lollypops Dump?

If we change the term "toxic waste" to "sunshine and lollypops," then homebuyers might not be so reluctant to purchase houses built next to a former sunshine and lollypops dump.

That's the basic logic behind a new FDA proposal to relax labeling regulations for foods treated with radiation to kill bacteria. Apparently consumers are turned off by product labels that indicate the food has been irradiated. So the proposed rule would allow some foods to use the word "pasteurized" instead of "irradiated," even though the pasteurization process is completely different than the process of exposing food to radiation.

Wait - it gets better.

The proposal would also allow food manufacturers to petition the FDA with suggestions for other alternate terms to replace…that word no one wants to use.

May I suggest "toasted"? Or how about "grilled to perfection"? Or maybe "shizzled"?

As you might guess, critics say that alternate terms - including "pasteurized" - are misleading. And you'll never guess who agrees with them. The FDA! The proposal actually includes this statement: "Research indicates that many consumers regard substitute terms for irradiation to be misleading."

Gee, ya think?

If someone were trying to make the FDA look ridiculous, they couldn't do a better job than the FDA.

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